Netflix Diaries is a weekly feature on Criticize This! that looks at what we’re watching via Netflix Canada, and our ongoing experience with the service. This feature is not sponsored or endorsed by Netflix Canada in any matter.
It’s Saturday night. The kid is in bed, I’ve watched all the DVDs I need to review for the upcoming week, and I don’t care that Jim Carrey is hosting Saturday Night Live again. I begin scrolling through Netflix on my Apple TV and realize I’ve never seen the Spanish horror flick [REC] (2007) even tough I’m a hardcore fan of the genre and it’s been recommended to me many times. It’s available in HD and is only 78 minutes long. Score. I hit play and just as I start to get into the film the stream chokes, pauses, and then skips forward. WTF? I stop the movie and start it again. It plays fine for a little bit and then does it again. Now I’m annoyed. I give it a third try before I can’t take it any longer. I decide to check another movie to see if it’s my network, Netflix, or if it’s [REC] that is the problem.
For some reason I decide Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus (2009) would be a good choice to test. I like silly monster movies and this one stars ‘80s teen queen Debbie Gibson. My wife cringes. Originally made for the SyFy channel in the U.S., Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus is an amazing combination of bad writing, acting, and effects (the effects actually look like they are from an old Super Nintendo game). The “Mega Shark” is not cool, and the “Giant Octopus” is lame. But Lorenzo Lamas is in it, and the ludicrous of it all makes me watch it from beginning to end (no issues with the stream).
Now that I know it’s not my network or Netflix giving me the issue, I try to watch [REC] once more over my Apple TV. Again, it craps out after a few minutes. I opt to watch it on my laptop where I can stream it in SD instead (I really want to watch this movie tonight). It works! And although it’s not the ideal viewing situation, I am immediately pulled into the crazy docu-style world that is [REC]. The film tells the story of a TV host and her cameraman out shadowing a team of firefighters overnight. When the firefighters get called to an apartment building where an incident with an older lady has happened, the host and cameraman follow. Things quickly get ugly inside the apartment building and they end up quarantined with a group of infected violent people. It’s very creepy and well made, and puts the American remake (Quarantine) to shame. Unfortunately [REC] 2 (2009) is not available on Netflix yet. I report the issues with the HD stream of the film and move on.
Since I’m knee deep into weird movies at this point, I feel like finishing the night off with something I’d probably never find time to watch again. The Machine Girl (2008) is one of those movies. The cover, a young Japanese girl in a school uniform with a machine gun for an arm, is intriguing, and the description says it’s “campy” and “violent”. Perfect. Let’s just say this is not a movie for the faint of heart. The amount of blood is outrageous. It’s as if the filmmakers found an air compressor right before production and just went nuts using it to spray everything with fake blood. And that girl on the cover? That’s actress Minase Yashiro and she kicks ass. The entire movie is her character seeking revenge on the gang that murdered her brother. She slices them up and eventually uses that machine gun arm to blow them to bits. Cheesy, but oh so awesome! The film is in Japanese with English subtitles and is only available to stream in SD.
Some recent titles we’ve noticed on Netflix Canada this week include London River (2010, SD), Republic of Doyle Season 2 (2010, HD), District 13: Ultimatum (2009, HD), and ExTerminators (2009, HD).
What are you watching on Netflix Canada? Let us know in the comments below and we might include it in an upcoming Netflix Diaries piece.
